Katie Klabusich

Host

Anxiety Talk & Disorder Solidarity

May 8, 2014·172 visitors

Anastasia Scangas

Cohost

Stage· 274 messages

May 8, 2014

Most of us have issues. Some of them are temporary; some last a lifetime. They shape who we are and how we interact with others. Despite being common, intense stigma pervades our culture & we hide everything from childhood trauma to eating disorders, hoping people will think we're "normal." nnWell, I'm not into that & neither is my co-host, Anastasia! We bonded on twitter during #AnxietyTalk & wondered: what would happen if we had some disorder solidarity around here?? We aim to find out.

Katie Klabusich · 11:58 PM

Hi, everyone! Thanks for coming to "Anxiety Talk & Disorder Solidarity!" (new ProTip: there’s a mobile app: https://itunes.apple.com/us/app/tawkers/id791417999?mt=8 )

Anastasia Scangas · 11:59 PM

Hi Everyone!

Katie Klabusich · 12:00 AM

Real quick, if you’re new to Tawkers, Anastasia and I will be chatting on the left. And if you’re signed in (it only takes two minutes to set up a profile!), you can add comments/questions on the right. Interrupt any time with questions!

Katie Klabusich · 12:00 AM

Also, definitely use the “arrow” icons to share comments on social media & ask people you know will dig the discussion to join in.

Katie Klabusich · 12:01 AM

Disclaimer time:n**Trigger Warning** for this tawk, just in case we wander into territory that’s personal, confessional or possibly, well, triggering for some. Also, my tawks are a safe space.

Katie Klabusich · 12:01 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“hello Katie”

Katie Klabusich · 12:01 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“hi anastasia”

Katie Klabusich · 12:02 AM

And, obvi, Anastasia and I aren't giving medical advice; we're here to share our stories, chat with you and build community. :0

Katie Klabusich · 12:02 AM

Also, no abusive language will be tolerated. If you need to mute someone, click the “ … “ under the thumbs in their comment or click on their profile.

Katie Klabusich · 12:02 AM

With the disclaimers out of the way, Welcome to Anxiety Talk & Disorder Solidarity! Thanks so much for joining me, Anastasia!

Anastasia Scangas · 12:03 AM

Thank you for having me, I'm excited!

Katie Klabusich · 12:03 AM

Me too! You and I knew each other from offline stuff, but really bonded during one of my twitter rants on #AnxietyTalk.

Katie Klabusich · 12:03 AM

We realized how little communication we do with other people who deal with disorders and thought, shouldn't we be able to get together and talk about this stuff.

Katie Klabusich · 12:04 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“cool =]”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:04 AM

Because many of our experiences, although we have different disorders, are similar, if not the same!

Katie Klabusich · 12:04 AM

Truth. Even people who don't have a diagnosed "anxiety disorder" have a lot of similar issues and confront the same stigmas and stereotypes.

Katie Klabusich · 12:06 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“i hope so”

Katie Klabusich · 12:06 AM

I'll roll first with my basic issue: I have raging ADD and my (likely generalized) anxiety disorder was misdiagnosed bipolar in my early 20's. So it's been 15 years of trying to figure it out, "be normal" and "just deal."

Katie Klabusich · 12:07 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“no doubt”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:07 AM

I'll through out what's up with me: I have an eating disorder, well, lots of eating disorders, and my anxiety disorder is caused by the eating disorder

Katie Klabusich · 12:08 AM

So your anxiety issues are "secondary" (by which I don't mean less than, just causal) to the eating disorder.

Anastasia Scangas · 12:08 AM

Exactly!

Anastasia Scangas · 12:08 AM

And, because of that, many people disregard the anxiety disorder.

Katie Klabusich · 12:08 AM

I suppose they interplay to create a causal circle.

Katie Klabusich · 12:08 AM

Yeah, people like you to have ONE THING wrong with you.

Anastasia Scangas · 12:09 AM

And since, for me, it's

Anastasia Scangas · 12:09 AM

"just an eating disorder," there's nothing "wrong"

Katie Klabusich · 12:10 AM

Heh. Yeah, folks with anxiety issues as primary or secondary diagnoses, work REALLY hard to calm the people around them down. And make them comfortable.

Katie Klabusich · 12:10 AM

Which is exhausting and -- of course -- anxiety causing.

Anastasia Scangas · 12:10 AM

Robin, you're right on. I've actually experienced this in treatment, where people have told me I don't have an eating disorder because I don't want to be thin

Katie Klabusich · 12:11 AM

Wait, you mean there is more than one kind of eating disorder?? -_-

Anastasia Scangas · 12:11 AM

There are! MULTIPLE! And they can all be caused by various things!

Katie Klabusich · 12:11 AM

Me too, Nicole -- I have trouble eating when I'm having a rough day.

Katie Klabusich · 12:11 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“i think our societal expectation that 'thinner is better" causes some eating disorders.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:12 AM

Which, from what Anastasia has told me before, leads right back into her eating disorder. One leads to the other which leads back to the first one, etc.

Katie Klabusich · 12:12 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“and other reasons, of course, as with me.”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:12 AM

It's a fun cycle, that many don't understand.

Katie Klabusich · 12:13 AM

For sure.

Katie Klabusich · 12:13 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“that does not compute”

Katie Klabusich · 12:13 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“Interesting as my generalized anxiety disorder has caused some disordered eating with me.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:13 AM

Do you find people have an easier time empathizing with food over anxiety?

Katie Klabusich · 12:14 AM

I know with me, people don't think anxiety is "real."

Anastasia Scangas · 12:14 AM

From my experience, most people understand the anxiety, but not the eating disorder.

Katie Klabusich · 12:14 AM

Yeah, "calm down" is right up there with "It'll be fine."

Anastasia Scangas · 12:15 AM

I hate patronizing talk

Katie Klabusich · 12:15 AM

Interesting. I'd assume they'd have a harder time dismissing the food. Obviously, neither is cool and the lack of empathy is totally fear driven.

Katie Klabusich · 12:15 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“maybe so.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:15 AM

People don't want to feel out of control and being around someone with A DISORDER makes them feel out of control.

Katie Klabusich · 12:16 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“yea... like "don't be silly, there's nothing to worry about" "calm down!"”

Katie Klabusich · 12:16 AM

Michael -- marginalized groups definitely have more pressure to succeed "on behalf" of a group. Is that what you're getting at?

Anastasia Scangas · 12:16 AM

Exactly. Since I'm a restrictive eater, many people do not understand how I "can do that," but they can understand anxiety in terms of stres

Anastasia Scangas · 12:16 AM

Katie Klabusich · 12:17 AM

★ Spotlighted from Michael Nam

“While I have no diagnosed disorders, I would say the anxiety I feel comes more culturally, based on both how I was raised and my self-image in light of being Asian-Am”

Katie Klabusich · 12:17 AM

Clarice - that's probably true to a degree. The majority of humans deal with a mental health issue in their lives -- more than half the population at any one given time, but we're "supposed" to hide it.

Anastasia Scangas · 12:18 AM

Nicole, you bring up a good point as well: everyone "understands" disorders if they're CAUSED by something

Katie Klabusich · 12:18 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“I've noticed that people only associate eating disorders with the desire to be thin / rapidly losing weight”

Katie Klabusich · 12:18 AM

Clarice -- I am also an anxiety non-eater, which sets off my low blood sugar which creates a cycle.

Katie Klabusich · 12:18 AM

YES..

Katie Klabusich · 12:18 AM

Girl.

Katie Klabusich · 12:18 AM

SEriously.

Katie Klabusich · 12:18 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“I think people have trouble grasping anxiety especially if it is caused by something totally random. People have trouble understanding why a restaurant atmosphere will trigger an anxiety attack.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:18 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“I think that everyone has a disorder of some sorts”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:19 AM

It amazing how long I was able to "pass off" my eating disorder as "stress-related"

Katie Klabusich · 12:19 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“why is it about fear?”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:19 AM

EVERYONE understood, so no one intervened

Katie Klabusich · 12:19 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“makes them nervous anyway... anxiety. = D”

Katie Klabusich · 12:19 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“i think yer right, clarice.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:19 AM

That you felt you had to do that is infuriating for me. We're taught not to talk about it and not make others uncomfortable.

Katie Klabusich · 12:19 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“I'm a stress 'non-eater' also, but by my size (I'm stocky), no one would guess it”

Katie Klabusich · 12:20 AM

Right -- it also leads to people not seeking help, being able to access help, or thinking they DESERVE help.

Katie Klabusich · 12:20 AM

"I should be able to handle this. Other people are able to handle this. Nothing is even wrong."

Katie Klabusich · 12:20 AM

Just me?

Anastasia Scangas · 12:20 AM

Nope, that's me too!

Katie Klabusich · 12:21 AM

We feel uncomfortable a lot of the time and don't want other people to feel uncomfortable, so we twist ourselves in knots trying to be "normal" so as not to put others out.

Katie Klabusich · 12:21 AM

★ Spotlighted from Michael Nam

“There is the "model minority" myth pressure, there is the feeling of being ostracized in a country where the default setting is white, and there was your general "living by old world rules while surrounded by new world values" narrative”

Katie Klabusich · 12:21 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“Like, your dog died so you are depressed. You were locked in a closet one time so you have anxiety. But anxiety that stems from, "I'm afraid if I eat X it will make me sick" doesn't stick with people.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:21 AM

That's amplified if the person with the disorder is part of a marginalized group who's ALREADY working hard to make people comfortable around them.

Anastasia Scangas · 12:22 AM

Very true. I think a lot of the acceptance of my disorder was hidden by me trying to "fit in" in my grad program.

Katie Klabusich · 12:22 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“certainly not just you, Katie”

Katie Klabusich · 12:22 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“I feel a lot of guilt over having depression and anxiety out of nowhere or that it gets triggered by very minor things.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:22 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“i don't take many pains to hide my disorders. if they don't like they can talk to someone else.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:23 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“Nicole, I do too, I'm been in therapy most of my adult life, and only recently been able to talk about it with my mom”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:23 AM

Exactly! When we are trying to make other comfortable, we end up not tending to our own needs and disregarding our self care

Katie Klabusich · 12:24 AM

Michael -- that's rough. I have a family that feels that way, though not as large of a community. "Don't let people outside the family know about such-and-such."

Anastasia Scangas · 12:24 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“most of the people i know, are well aware i am "eccentric". it sort of comes with being "creative" by stereotype.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:24 AM

I actually started talking about it out of frustration. I had such a paralyzing day I couldn't take it and I started venting on twitter.

Katie Klabusich · 12:24 AM

I figured, I talk about every other gawddamn thing; nothing is off limits about me. Why hadn't I talked about this?

Katie Klabusich · 12:25 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“I think that we are taught to not 'make' other people feel uncomfortable, which, of course, makes the problem worse”

Katie Klabusich · 12:25 AM

★ Spotlighted from Michael Nam

“People in my community still frown upon asking for that kind of help, though that's slowly changing”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:25 AM

I've noticed that Nicole, we have a few people who have GAD in our program, and it's "unacceptable" that we take meds

Katie Klabusich · 12:25 AM

@Nicole -- you'd think -_- in a culture with so many prescription meds around, people wouldn't bat an eye, right?

Katie Klabusich · 12:25 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“me too, therapy forever. its easy to be open about it now. i'm used to talking about it.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:26 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“Thanks Robin. I'm getting better at it as I find like-minded people”

Katie Klabusich · 12:26 AM

That brings up a good question. I'm asking it sort of selfishly as I'm unmedicated and frustrated: how does everyone feel about/have you used/are you using meds?

Katie Klabusich · 12:26 AM

(Only if you feel comfortable sharing.)

Katie Klabusich · 12:26 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“thats great, clarice. =]”

Katie Klabusich · 12:26 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“I made a comment that I didn't realize people would have been taken back by... which was I told my co-workers that on meeting days (when 50+ people are shoved into a not so accommodating room) that I have to medicate myself. They found it strange.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:26 AM

Clarice -- FFS. That's obnoxious.

Katie Klabusich · 12:26 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“Even though they are all aware I have GAD>”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:26 AM

I think a lot of the stigma comes from people *THINKING* they know what it's like to, say, suffer anxiety

Katie Klabusich · 12:27 AM

YES -- "Oh, I'm afraid of public speaking." and "I totally get nervous when X"

Katie Klabusich · 12:27 AM

Robin -- I went through trials for a lot of bipolar meds. I feel you. Awful.

Katie Klabusich · 12:27 AM

I think it's made me skeptical (and, um, anxious) about meds.

Katie Klabusich · 12:28 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“you'd think so”

Katie Klabusich · 12:28 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“I've found that people don't like to hear much about meds - I have random and debilitating joint pain, and comments like "I'll be able to take notes once the meds kick in" makes people nervous”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:28 AM

It's definitely understandable to be skeptical and anxious about neuro meds.

Anastasia Scangas · 12:28 AM

Fortunately (unfortunately?), as a medicinal chemist, I know more than I should, which doesn't help.

Katie Klabusich · 12:28 AM

@Nicole -- that's why I'm rooting for Cuomo to follow through on the state medical marijuana.

Katie Klabusich · 12:28 AM

Robin -- that's how I deal too.

Katie Klabusich · 12:29 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“i was diagnosed with bi-polar disoder and other about 20 years ago. i did try many many medications. all they did was make me so tired all i could do was eat and sleep.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:29 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“I happily take my Ativan as needed on the onset or if i feel I may have an anxiety attack. However, I am scared to go on a maintenance med.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:29 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“now i am not on any psychotropics.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:29 AM

What are some of your coping strategies? How do you mitigate the potential for disruption of a bad day or hour?

Katie Klabusich · 12:29 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“I'm medicated for both depression and anxiety; I've quit occasionally (mostly due to insurance lapse), and I'm planning to stay with it”

Katie Klabusich · 12:30 AM

Balancing mental health issues with other physical issues can be a challenge -- a few people have mentioned. Like, my allergy meds are a stimulant. I *should* be on a stimulant for the ADD.

Katie Klabusich · 12:30 AM

But the anxiety "requires" a depressant. It's a frustrating balance.

Katie Klabusich · 12:30 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“i do have a "carefully constructed environment" which enables me to be "normal" most of the time.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:30 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“Find docs you can trust. I wouldn't have started again if I didn't trust the psychiatrist”

Katie Klabusich · 12:30 AM

Nicole -- is that reducing some of your triggers?

Katie Klabusich · 12:30 AM

Reducing...or mitigating? (poor word choice)

Katie Klabusich · 12:31 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“I am also in therapy and trying to deal that way instead of with the other meds.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:31 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“Anastasia, I hear you on knowing more than you should with a science background ...”

Katie Klabusich · 12:31 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“good to know, katie. it works for me.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:31 AM

Clarice -- with you. You should see my cuticles.

Anastasia Scangas · 12:31 AM

★ Spotlighted from Michael Nam

“It's amazing how much these problems are exacerbated by the lack of empathy people have around this subject matter”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:31 AM

Fiddling with things (silly putty!) is one of my go to coping skills

Katie Klabusich · 12:32 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“hmmm. keep stress to a minimum. helps now my daughter is in a different town. ;]”

Katie Klabusich · 12:32 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“I am doing EMDR therapy which is also partially maybe psueudosciencey. Or at least science hasn't made a conclusion yet.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:32 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“don't socialize very much, especially in crowds.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:32 AM

@A -- OMG I'm going to get silly putty.

Katie Klabusich · 12:32 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“I got into situations in grad school where I couldn't control anything, so I was anxious about everything, all the time, no matter the company, and that's why I started meds. Before meds, I used to fiddle with something in my hands to settle myself,”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:32 AM

I think identifying triggers is one of the most important steps to dealing with it

Anastasia Scangas · 12:33 AM

(highly recommend the silly putty, it's the best. and mini slinkys)

Katie Klabusich · 12:33 AM

Nicole -- that's great! Is it less panicky to be triggered when you know what's causing (at least partly) the response?

Katie Klabusich · 12:33 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“Nicole, I did EMDR for a bit, and found it helpful”

Katie Klabusich · 12:34 AM

★ Spotlighted from Chuck Moran

“EMDR helped me break through a really weird anxiety issue ... one session did it.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:34 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“It's helping me realize where some of the triggers are coming from. But not yet reducing them. I don't think I've been at it long enough.”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:34 AM

For me, I can definitely "deal" when I know a trigger is coming, which is why I'm a big fan of trigger warnings

Anastasia Scangas · 12:34 AM

It might still affect me, but I can prep ahead of time

Katie Klabusich · 12:34 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“Katie, my nails have gotten better since I found small squishy balls, tiny stuffed animals, and those chinese medicine balls (small ones)”

Katie Klabusich · 12:34 AM

Yeah, I know a couple of mine. They're mostly schedule/routine/stress/life change based. Even positive change sets me off.

Katie Klabusich · 12:34 AM

Which is frustrating b/c I don't get to celebrate milestones, really.

Katie Klabusich · 12:35 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“I'm glad to hear other stories from you all about EMDR!”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:35 AM

Or the "nothing" triggers, the ones that have never set you off before

Katie Klabusich · 12:35 AM

"What's wrong?"

Katie Klabusich · 12:35 AM

-__-

Katie Klabusich · 12:35 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“i find that, since i don't think i ever really knew what "normal" is, i do not know how to be "normal". that is frustrating sometimes. and, i like eccentricity.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:35 AM

Have any of you share with your closer networks what kinds of things are helpful and how you're triggered? Curious about their receptiveness.

Katie Klabusich · 12:35 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“I can definitely be better prepared and think through things better and communicate with folks better about what is happening to me.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:35 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“@ Katie, for me it does. I know I don't like crowds and new people, so I work myself up to it, and then plan serious self care afterwards”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:36 AM

I have in terms of my eating disorder, and while people have been understanding, they still look at me like I have three heads when I say, no, Chinese food scares me right now

Katie Klabusich · 12:36 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“I think the prep is helpful. The ones out of nowhere suck”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:37 AM

I've actually lost friends/support over that one

Katie Klabusich · 12:37 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“Anastasia, exactly”

Katie Klabusich · 12:37 AM

It's hard to acknowledge how awful people can be.

Katie Klabusich · 12:37 AM

How do you find perspective about that?

Katie Klabusich · 12:38 AM

Chruck -- OCD is a hard one to explain and get empathy on b/c it's a colloquial term these days. Frustrating.

Katie Klabusich · 12:38 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“some are rather condescendingly 'comforting' and basically dismiss the importance i feel with it.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:38 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“Yes. Especially boyfriends and close friends as physical contact can be a terrible trigger for me.”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:39 AM

Nicole, I can definitely sympathize with that one

Katie Klabusich · 12:39 AM

★ Spotlighted from Chuck Moran

“I don't really talk about it. My partner is supportive when but even she gets impatient with some of my OCD manifestations.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:39 AM

YEP -- with ya, Chuck.

Katie Klabusich · 12:40 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“It's hard when restaurants are a trigger since people seem to gather in them as a societal norm. I've lost friends by simply drifting away.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:40 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“people who do not experience these things mostly do not understtand it.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:40 AM

Nicole -- have you developed a way you communicate with each other about when you need support, when you need space, etc?

Katie Klabusich · 12:41 AM

★ Spotlighted from Chuck Moran

“Katie - OCD = VERY frustrating. You know it's happening and it's better to go along than fight the impulses ... less anxiety.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:41 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“Also, people don't understand that under my own terms I can eat in a restaurant and then don't understand why I won't go with them to a certain place.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:41 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“I still struggle with trying to explain that feeling of needing to flee to someone who have never experienced an anxiety attack, even if they are supportive”

Katie Klabusich · 12:41 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“Chuck - being patient is hard for me too. My husband has some MH issues and even with my own I have trouble at times with is. It makes me feel awful.”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:41 AM

I've done this as well, although I've found people who do not know me as well, don't take it seriously. Or they take "panic attack" in the colloquial sense (think AbFab)

Katie Klabusich · 12:42 AM

Yeah. Colloquialism and ableism have really paired together in our society.

Katie Klabusich · 12:42 AM

It definitely doesn't help that we have "mental health" separate from "health."

Anastasia Scangas · 12:42 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“I have recently brought it up in an almost joking tone: That if a co-worker did something I might have a panic attack, and with those I stop breathing, so you may want to consider not doing [trigger that I can't remember right now]”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:42 AM

Because, the mind and body aren't connected, not at all.

Anastasia Scangas · 12:42 AM

I've found this to be a problem with insurance, as well

Katie Klabusich · 12:43 AM

btw -- GREAT resource for people looking for a new/different doc: http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/?tr=Hdr_Brand

Katie Klabusich · 12:43 AM

A really good friend recommended the site to me. You can search by area and insurance/sliding scale, etc.

Katie Klabusich · 12:43 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“No. We are lacking that now. I'm working on it with my therapist. Unfortunately he is not as willing to participate.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:43 AM

Nicole -- ME TOO. I haven't had a PCP in YEARS b/c of OBGYN needs (used all my allotted visits there).

Katie Klabusich · 12:44 AM

My new doc spent over an hour with me and we went through EVERYTHING. She sent me referrals -- which I'm working my way through -- and then wants me to come back, all my diagnoses in hand, to work out comprehensive treatment.

Katie Klabusich · 12:44 AM

I was like o.O

Katie Klabusich · 12:45 AM

★ Spotlighted from Chuck Moran

“Thanks for the link, Katie!”

Katie Klabusich · 12:45 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“I am SO glad my PCP is really good about my mental health care.”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:45 AM

Has anyone found online forums good for peer support?

Katie Klabusich · 12:45 AM

I'm pretty psyched. Been ignoring long term issues for like 10 years -- I think it's another reason I'm talking about it now. I have help avenues & don't have to suppress & avoid for survival.

Katie Klabusich · 12:45 AM

Good question!

Katie Klabusich · 12:46 AM

★ Spotlighted from Michael Nam

“It's so tough to get support networks that understand some friends of mine even started a secular group for mental health peer support...since, again, that lack of empathy in general”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:46 AM

For me, when I first started, I frequented a couple of forums, which helped me to understand that I wasn't alone, that there wasn't something "wrong" with me.

Katie Klabusich · 12:46 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“Katie, that's fantastic.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:47 AM

Yeah, I'm doing a chat next week on 12-step program alternatives partly b/c of what Nicole is talking about.

Katie Klabusich · 12:47 AM

@A -- that's great. That was HUGE for me, discovering that I'm not so unusual and therefore untreatable and unhelpable.

Katie Klabusich · 12:48 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“I belong to a private peer support forum for atheists and it's been tremendously helpful.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:48 AM

★ Spotlighted from Michael Nam

“Not my own experience, but those same friends seem to mostly find peer support online being distant from each other and sometimes isolated”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:48 AM

For me, the feeling of, "you're alone, you're a 'freak'" really helped to feed (heh heh) the eating disorder

Katie Klabusich · 12:48 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“It's nice to be able to talk about depression without someone stating that the depression is just a lack of Jesus.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:48 AM

Oh, thank goodness. I've been awkwardly avoiding that pun for an hour.

Katie Klabusich · 12:48 AM

;)

Katie Klabusich · 12:49 AM

★ Spotlighted from Michael Nam

“Help Without Heaven?”

Katie Klabusich · 12:49 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“fer sure, nicole!”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:49 AM

I like to throw in a good pun now and then

Katie Klabusich · 12:49 AM

Anybody notice is pretty clinic escort heavy in here tonight?

Katie Klabusich · 12:49 AM

It's almost like those folks understand pressure, empathy and non engagement.

Anastasia Scangas · 12:49 AM

(represent!)

Katie Klabusich · 12:49 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“Yeah Michael!”

Katie Klabusich · 12:50 AM

We've got about 70 people in the chat -- and I see a lot of repro healthcare clinic folks.

Katie Klabusich · 12:50 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“I'm including SMART Recovery as part of the specifically secular mental health chat I am doing next week, .”

Katie Klabusich · 12:50 AM

Clarice -- WORD. My dad accidentally gave me that. he and his brothers needed it to survive growing up, so I inherited it.

Katie Klabusich · 12:50 AM

★ Spotlighted from Michael Nam

“Right, we have mutual friends, of course”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:50 AM

Escorting has only triggered me once, and it wasn't anything to do with escorting specifically

Anastasia Scangas · 12:51 AM

My parents, thankfully, actually threatened to pull me out of therapy if it interfered in escorting

Katie Klabusich · 12:51 AM

Robin -- escorts walk patients past picketers are abortion clinics.

Katie Klabusich · 12:51 AM

So, that should be super stressful.

Katie Klabusich · 12:51 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“My therapist thinks it's the most hilarious thing that escorting rarely ever triggers a damn thing for me.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:51 AM

There's a really high rate of anxiety folks who do that volunteer work.

Katie Klabusich · 12:51 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“I find keeping a sense of humor is essential, even if not always possible”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:52 AM

And a super high burn out rate.

Katie Klabusich · 12:52 AM

Patients are the only reason I'm there.

Katie Klabusich · 12:52 AM

Robin -- probably you do. If you have a clinic, there are likely picketers.

Anastasia Scangas · 12:52 AM

Me too. I try to quench tension by talking nonsense to the patients

Anastasia Scangas · 12:53 AM

bringing the focus to a little circle around them, or talking about the weather

Katie Klabusich · 12:53 AM

Chuck -- I haven't really figured it out. But I think it's our ability to make other people feel comfortable and not freaking out when another person looks panicked.

Anastasia Scangas · 12:53 AM

Robin, you'd be surprise the amount of protesting/ruckus a couple of people can cause

Katie Klabusich · 12:53 AM

★ Spotlighted from Michael Nam

“Antis just trigger my anger”

Katie Klabusich · 12:54 AM

NIcole -- me too

Katie Klabusich · 12:54 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“with escorting, does focusing on the patient help?”

Katie Klabusich · 12:54 AM

It's why I sometimes crash after.

Anastasia Scangas · 12:54 AM

The days our clinic only has two are three are, generally, the most stressfull.

Katie Klabusich · 12:54 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“interesting. i don't think we have that problem in this smallish town.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:54 AM

★ Spotlighted from Michael Nam

“I'm prone to get more short-of-breath getting called into an office of any kind by someone”

Katie Klabusich · 12:54 AM

★ Spotlighted from Chuck Moran

“Katie - what do you think accounts for the high number of anxiety folks doing escorting?”

Katie Klabusich · 12:54 AM

AND -- full circle -- why I have to take protein bars and bananas with me. I get anxiety stomach and blood sugar.

Anastasia Scangas · 12:55 AM

I think it also gives us a good "excuse" to engage in self-care,

Katie Klabusich · 12:55 AM

Not because I'm super anxious, but b/c I automatically do mitigating behavior like shallow breathing, etc.

Katie Klabusich · 12:55 AM

TOTALLY, @A!

Katie Klabusich · 12:55 AM

Rebecca -- that's not really what we're talking about.

Katie Klabusich · 12:55 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“For me, I think because I am doing something that is completely for someone else, I almost get this "out of body" feeling. Where my issues don't matter. Only the patients matter at that moment.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:55 AM

This is about anxiety disorders, etc, not someone dealing with one passing life event.

Katie Klabusich · 12:56 AM

Though I'm guessing Nicole and Michael might have some good secular links/sites stashed somewhere. ;)

Katie Klabusich · 12:56 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“It's almost like I can completely leave "me" at home when I escort. My problems mean nothing for that time.”

Katie Klabusich · 12:57 AM

★ Spotlighted from Michael Nam

“I'm a people pleaser, so doing things I genuinely feel helps people is comfortable. I think it's described on that Myers Briggs test if anyone puts store in that”

Katie Klabusich · 12:57 AM

NICE!

Anastasia Scangas · 12:57 AM

Pre-coping!

Katie Klabusich · 12:57 AM

Katie Klabusich · 12:57 AM

@A I LOVE that -- pre-coping. I do a lot of that.

Katie Klabusich · 12:57 AM

Would it be helpful if we did one of these every so often?

Anastasia Scangas · 12:57 AM

That's huge Nicole!

Katie Klabusich · 12:57 AM

Just an excuse to get together, chat, talk about what's currently happening? Cool.

Anastasia Scangas · 12:58 AM

I'd like it!

Katie Klabusich · 12:58 AM

I don't want to put the pressure on @A to co-host every time, lol, so shoot me a message on FB/Twitter if you'd be into sitting in the co-host chair.

Katie Klabusich · 12:58 AM

(There's no work, just "accept the invite" and show up. ;) )

Katie Klabusich · 12:58 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“But, I will say that I was stoked that today I was in a room full of people, half strangers, had to accept an award and I did just fine. (With a preemptive Ativan)”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:58 AM

Hey there, I enjoy it!

Katie Klabusich · 12:59 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“@ Nicole - congrats!!”

Katie Klabusich · 12:59 AM

Sweet! I'll toss this back in rotation and see if we can do this like every 6-8 weeks so people know it's on the horizon.

Katie Klabusich · 12:59 AM

★ Spotlighted from Chuck Moran

“Yes, Katie!”

Katie Klabusich · 12:59 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“I think so”

Katie Klabusich · 12:59 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“I even ate a cookie in front of all those people! Nyah!”

Anastasia Scangas · 12:59 AM

I think that's a great time frame!

Katie Klabusich · 12:59 AM

Hooray! Well, thank you SO much everybody for coming!

Anastasia Scangas · 12:59 AM

Thank you for hosting!

Katie Klabusich · 1:00 AM

@A, thanks for co-hosting the inaugural chat!

Katie Klabusich · 1:00 AM

★ Spotlighted from Michael Nam

“@rebecca - try Grief Beyond Belief...you can find them online”

Katie Klabusich · 1:00 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“Yeah. I love kind of an informal chat about a sort of formal topic.”

Anastasia Scangas · 1:00 AM

Thank you all for "coming!"

Katie Klabusich · 1:00 AM

Thanks so much, everyone! Feel free to keep chatting or come find us on the twitter!

Katie Klabusich · 1:00 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“@ Nicole, indeed. And to celebrate success”

Anastasia Scangas · 1:01 AM

You too!

Katie Klabusich · 1:01 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“yep, great idea”

Katie Klabusich · 1:01 AM

★ Spotlighted from Michael Nam

“excllent”

Katie Klabusich · 1:01 AM

★ Spotlighted from Nicole Harris

“Thanks for hosting! Looking forward to it again!”

Katie Klabusich · 1:01 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“thanks for the tawk”

Anastasia Scangas · 1:02 AM

★ Spotlighted from Clarice Piper

“Thanks all for your openness and sharing!”

Katie Klabusich · 1:02 AM

★ Spotlighted from Robin Maynard

“have a great evening”

Forum · 122

Forum· 122 comments

172 visitors

Tawkers AdminApr 18, 2014, 10:49 PM

Welcome to the comment section of the Tawk, where audience members can share their thoughts about the main conversation happening on the left. Don't by shy! Entering questions and comments is the only way to get the attention of the two Hosts on stage!

Rebecca Westbrook TokerApr 21, 2014, 6:11 PM

As a special ed teacher, I have a love-hate relationship with labels because I see them applied in ways that lower expectations. But for ME, I am so empowered every time I find a word for what I am - and the community of others. <3

Robin MaynardMay 7, 2014, 11:59 PM★ Spotlighted

hello Katie

Robin MaynardMay 7, 2014, 11:59 PM★ Spotlighted

hi anastasia

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:02 AM★ Spotlighted

cool =]

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:04 AM★ Spotlighted

i hope so

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:05 AM★ Spotlighted

no doubt

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:07 AM

i wanted to be normal once, but i got over it in a few days.

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:10 AM★ Spotlighted

i think our societal expectation that 'thinner is better" causes some eating disorders.

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:10 AM★ Spotlighted

and other reasons, of course, as with me.

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:11 AM★ Spotlighted

that does not compute

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:11 AM★ Spotlighted

Interesting as my generalized anxiety disorder has caused some disordered eating with me.

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:12 AM

i have trouble NOT eating too much every day.

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:13 AM★ Spotlighted

maybe so.

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:14 AM★ Spotlighted

yea... like "don't be silly, there's nothing to worry about" "calm down!"

Michael NamMay 8, 2014, 12:14 AM★ Spotlighted

While I have no diagnosed disorders, I would say the anxiety I feel comes more culturally, based on both how I was raised and my self-image in light of being Asian-Am

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:15 AM★ Spotlighted

I've noticed that people only associate eating disorders with the desire to be thin / rapidly losing weight

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:15 AM★ Spotlighted

I think people have trouble grasping anxiety especially if it is caused by something totally random. People have trouble understanding why a restaurant atmosphere will trigger an anxiety attack.

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:15 AM★ Spotlighted

why is it about fear?

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:16 AM★ Spotlighted

I think that everyone has a disorder of some sorts

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:16 AM★ Spotlighted

makes them nervous anyway... anxiety. = D

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:17 AM★ Spotlighted

i think yer right, clarice.

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:18 AM★ Spotlighted

I'm a stress 'non-eater' also, but by my size (I'm stocky), no one would guess it

Michael NamMay 8, 2014, 12:19 AM★ Spotlighted

There is the "model minority" myth pressure, there is the feeling of being ostracized in a country where the default setting is white, and there was your general "living by old world rules while surrounded by new world values" narrative

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:19 AM★ Spotlighted

Like, your dog died so you are depressed. You were locked in a closet one time so you have anxiety. But anxiety that stems from, "I'm afraid if I eat X it will make me sick" doesn't stick with people.

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:20 AM★ Spotlighted

certainly not just you, Katie

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:20 AM★ Spotlighted

I feel a lot of guilt over having depression and anxiety out of nowhere or that it gets triggered by very minor things.

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:20 AM★ Spotlighted

i don't take many pains to hide my disorders. if they don't like they can talk to someone else.

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:21 AM★ Spotlighted

Nicole, I do too, I'm been in therapy most of my adult life, and only recently been able to talk about it with my mom

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:22 AM★ Spotlighted

I think that we are taught to not 'make' other people feel uncomfortable, which, of course, makes the problem worse

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:22 AM★ Spotlighted

most of the people i know, are well aware i am "eccentric". it sort of comes with being "creative" by stereotype.

Michael NamMay 8, 2014, 12:23 AM★ Spotlighted

People in my community still frown upon asking for that kind of help, though that's slowly changing

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:23 AM★ Spotlighted

me too, therapy forever. its easy to be open about it now. i'm used to talking about it.

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:24 AM★ Spotlighted

Thanks Robin. I'm getting better at it as I find like-minded people

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:24 AM★ Spotlighted

thats great, clarice. =]

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:24 AM★ Spotlighted

I made a comment that I didn't realize people would have been taken back by... which was I told my co-workers that on meeting days (when 50+ people are shoved into a not so accommodating room) that I have to medicate myself. They found it strange.

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:24 AM★ Spotlighted

Even though they are all aware I have GAD>

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:26 AM★ Spotlighted

you'd think so

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:26 AM★ Spotlighted

I've found that people don't like to hear much about meds - I have random and debilitating joint pain, and comments like "I'll be able to take notes once the meds kick in" makes people nervous

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:27 AM★ Spotlighted

i was diagnosed with bi-polar disoder and other about 20 years ago. i did try many many medications. all they did was make me so tired all i could do was eat and sleep.

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:27 AM★ Spotlighted

I happily take my Ativan as needed on the onset or if i feel I may have an anxiety attack. However, I am scared to go on a maintenance med.

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:27 AM★ Spotlighted

now i am not on any psychotropics.

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:27 AM★ Spotlighted

I'm medicated for both depression and anxiety; I've quit occasionally (mostly due to insurance lapse), and I'm planning to stay with it

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:28 AM★ Spotlighted

i do have a "carefully constructed environment" which enables me to be "normal" most of the time.

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:28 AM★ Spotlighted

Find docs you can trust. I wouldn't have started again if I didn't trust the psychiatrist

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:29 AM★ Spotlighted

I am also in therapy and trying to deal that way instead of with the other meds.

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:29 AM★ Spotlighted

Anastasia, I hear you on knowing more than you should with a science background ...

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:29 AM★ Spotlighted

good to know, katie. it works for me.

Michael NamMay 8, 2014, 12:29 AM★ Spotlighted

It's amazing how much these problems are exacerbated by the lack of empathy people have around this subject matter

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:29 AM★ Spotlighted

hmmm. keep stress to a minimum. helps now my daughter is in a different town. ;]

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:30 AM★ Spotlighted

I am doing EMDR therapy which is also partially maybe psueudosciencey. Or at least science hasn't made a conclusion yet.

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:30 AM★ Spotlighted

don't socialize very much, especially in crowds.

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:30 AM★ Spotlighted

I got into situations in grad school where I couldn't control anything, so I was anxious about everything, all the time, no matter the company, and that's why I started meds. Before meds, I used to fiddle with something in my hands to settle myself,

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:31 AM★ Spotlighted

Nicole, I did EMDR for a bit, and found it helpful

Chuck MoranMay 8, 2014, 12:32 AM★ Spotlighted

EMDR helped me break through a really weird anxiety issue ... one session did it.

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:32 AM★ Spotlighted

It's helping me realize where some of the triggers are coming from. But not yet reducing them. I don't think I've been at it long enough.

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:32 AM★ Spotlighted

Katie, my nails have gotten better since I found small squishy balls, tiny stuffed animals, and those chinese medicine balls (small ones)

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:33 AM★ Spotlighted

I'm glad to hear other stories from you all about EMDR!

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:33 AM★ Spotlighted

i find that, since i don't think i ever really knew what "normal" is, i do not know how to be "normal". that is frustrating sometimes. and, i like eccentricity.

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:33 AM★ Spotlighted

I can definitely be better prepared and think through things better and communicate with folks better about what is happening to me.

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:34 AM★ Spotlighted

@ Katie, for me it does. I know I don't like crowds and new people, so I work myself up to it, and then plan serious self care afterwards

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:34 AM★ Spotlighted

I think the prep is helpful. The ones out of nowhere suck

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:35 AM★ Spotlighted

Anastasia, exactly

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:36 AM★ Spotlighted

some are rather condescendingly 'comforting' and basically dismiss the importance i feel with it.

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:37 AM★ Spotlighted

Yes. Especially boyfriends and close friends as physical contact can be a terrible trigger for me.

Chuck MoranMay 8, 2014, 12:37 AM★ Spotlighted

I don't really talk about it. My partner is supportive when but even she gets impatient with some of my OCD manifestations.

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:38 AM★ Spotlighted

It's hard when restaurants are a trigger since people seem to gather in them as a societal norm. I've lost friends by simply drifting away.

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:38 AM★ Spotlighted

people who do not experience these things mostly do not understtand it.

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:38 AM★ Spotlighted

Also, people don't understand that under my own terms I can eat in a restaurant and then don't understand why I won't go with them to a certain place.

Chuck MoranMay 8, 2014, 12:39 AM★ Spotlighted

Katie - OCD = VERY frustrating. You know it's happening and it's better to go along than fight the impulses ... less anxiety.

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:39 AM★ Spotlighted

I still struggle with trying to explain that feeling of needing to flee to someone who have never experienced an anxiety attack, even if they are supportive

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:39 AM★ Spotlighted

Chuck - being patient is hard for me too. My husband has some MH issues and even with my own I have trouble at times with is. It makes me feel awful.

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:40 AM★ Spotlighted

I have recently brought it up in an almost joking tone: That if a co-worker did something I might have a panic attack, and with those I stop breathing, so you may want to consider not doing [trigger that I can't remember right now]

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:41 AM★ Spotlighted

No. We are lacking that now. I'm working on it with my therapist. Unfortunately he is not as willing to participate.

Chuck MoranMay 8, 2014, 12:43 AM★ Spotlighted

Thanks for the link, Katie!

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:43 AM★ Spotlighted

I am SO glad my PCP is really good about my mental health care.

Michael NamMay 8, 2014, 12:43 AM★ Spotlighted

It's so tough to get support networks that understand some friends of mine even started a secular group for mental health peer support...since, again, that lack of empathy in general

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:44 AM★ Spotlighted

Katie, that's fantastic.

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:46 AM★ Spotlighted

I belong to a private peer support forum for atheists and it's been tremendously helpful.

Michael NamMay 8, 2014, 12:46 AM★ Spotlighted

Not my own experience, but those same friends seem to mostly find peer support online being distant from each other and sometimes isolated

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:46 AM★ Spotlighted

It's nice to be able to talk about depression without someone stating that the depression is just a lack of Jesus.

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:47 AM★ Spotlighted

fer sure, nicole!

Michael NamMay 8, 2014, 12:47 AM★ Spotlighted

Help Without Heaven?

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:47 AM★ Spotlighted

Yeah Michael!

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:48 AM★ Spotlighted

I'm including SMART Recovery as part of the specifically secular mental health chat I am doing next week, .

Michael NamMay 8, 2014, 12:48 AM★ Spotlighted

Right, we have mutual friends, of course

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:49 AM

wut?

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:50 AM★ Spotlighted

My therapist thinks it's the most hilarious thing that escorting rarely ever triggers a damn thing for me.

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:50 AM★ Spotlighted

I find keeping a sense of humor is essential, even if not always possible

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:50 AM

i don't know what 'escorting' is.

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:51 AM

ok. thank you

Michael NamMay 8, 2014, 12:52 AM★ Spotlighted

Antis just trigger my anger

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:52 AM★ Spotlighted

with escorting, does focusing on the patient help?

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:52 AM★ Spotlighted

interesting. i don't think we have that problem in this smallish town.

Michael NamMay 8, 2014, 12:52 AM★ Spotlighted

I'm prone to get more short-of-breath getting called into an office of any kind by someone

Chuck MoranMay 8, 2014, 12:52 AM★ Spotlighted

Katie - what do you think accounts for the high number of anxiety folks doing escorting?

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:53 AM

my daughter mentioned a couple people once, but thats it.

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:53 AM★ Spotlighted

For me, I think because I am doing something that is completely for someone else, I almost get this "out of body" feeling. Where my issues don't matter. Only the patients matter at that moment.

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:54 AM★ Spotlighted

It's almost like I can completely leave "me" at home when I escort. My problems mean nothing for that time.

Michael NamMay 8, 2014, 12:55 AM★ Spotlighted

I'm a people pleaser, so doing things I genuinely feel helps people is comfortable. I think it's described on that Myers Briggs test if anyone puts store in that

Rebecca Westbrook TokerMay 8, 2014, 12:55 AM

I have a friend who is an atheist whose Christian preacher father just passed. She was MAJORLY traumatized by the funeral and the God talk. Any thoughts on how I can help support her?

Rebecca Westbrook TokerMay 8, 2014, 12:56 AM

Oh, yeah, it is kinda different. Sorry.

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:56 AM★ Spotlighted

But, I will say that I was stoked that today I was in a room full of people, half strangers, had to accept an award and I did just fine. (With a preemptive Ativan)

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:57 AM★ Spotlighted

@ Nicole - congrats!!

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:57 AM★ Spotlighted

I even ate a cookie in front of all those people! Nyah!

Chuck MoranMay 8, 2014, 12:57 AM★ Spotlighted

Yes, Katie!

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:57 AM★ Spotlighted

I think so

Michael NamMay 8, 2014, 12:57 AM★ Spotlighted

@rebecca - try Grief Beyond Belief...you can find them online

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 12:58 AM★ Spotlighted

Yeah. I love kind of an informal chat about a sort of formal topic.

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 12:58 AM★ Spotlighted

@ Nicole, indeed. And to celebrate success

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 12:59 AM★ Spotlighted

yep, great idea

Michael NamMay 8, 2014, 12:59 AM★ Spotlighted

excllent

Nicole HarrisMay 8, 2014, 1:00 AM★ Spotlighted

Thanks for hosting! Looking forward to it again!

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 1:00 AM★ Spotlighted

thanks for the tawk

Clarice PiperMay 8, 2014, 1:00 AM★ Spotlighted

Thanks all for your openness and sharing!

Chuck MoranMay 8, 2014, 1:00 AM

Thanks, you two (and group). I appreciate the effort and expertise!

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 1:00 AM★ Spotlighted

have a great evening

Rebecca Westbrook TokerMay 8, 2014, 1:00 AM

I don't think I'm being clear - I'm asking how to help her cope with so much contact with Christians. It's really getting to her. She's got the grief thing down. It's just all the unwanted Jesus comments.

Robin MaynardMay 8, 2014, 1:01 AM

Rebecca, do they know she does not 'believe"?

Michael NamMay 8, 2014, 1:01 AM

I think people in Grief Beyond Belief can help with that as well...I know how difficult to some extent that can be. There are those who went through it at Grief Beyond Belief as well

Johnathonfall thethirdAug 27, 2014, 12:37 AM

Most don't realize because they don't really know how to recognize PTSD with the symptoms, causes and the solutions.

Johnathonfall thethirdAug 27, 2014, 12:39 AM

Most are able to figure out if a person is high or drunk, but we just can't seem to notice when a person is currently suffering from some type of emotional trauma and how it effects the brain.