KC

Fifty, Fabulous & F*#kable

Aug 1, 2013

WH
Stage· 206 messages
Aug 1, 2013

Kelly and Wendy (writer/performer of the solo show Ripe) will riff on the gifts of being women in their 50s... such as the freedom to do and be as you please in a culture that basically ignores you; the wisdom that comes from being in the "been there done that" time of life; and the power & wisdom of the loving one's body. n

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Kelly Carlin · 12:00 AM

Hey Everyone!
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Kelly Carlin · 12:00 AM

Judith - you're doing it perfect.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:00 AM

hey there, wendy here
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Kelly Carlin · 12:00 AM

Welcome Wendy!
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Wendy Hammers · 12:01 AM

hooray. the technotard is online
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Kelly Carlin · 12:01 AM

★ Spotlighted from Jordan Birnbaum

“40 is SO MUCH BETTER than 30 that I imagine 50 is nirvana. (Sucks to be 20, eh?)”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:01 AM

So glad to get the gals together - with Jordan who is a a very manly man.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:01 AM

waaay better that 20 or 30 jordan. no doubt
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Wendy Hammers · 12:01 AM

jordan must be a real man, one that loves hanging out with women
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Kelly Carlin · 12:02 AM

So, I thought we'd jump in and chat about Ripe - and what an inspiration it is for women who see it.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:02 AM

★ Spotlighted from Judith Krain

“I thought 50's were the best, but then I turned 60!!!”

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Wendy Hammers · 12:03 AM

thanks, kelly. shall i just say a bit about what the play is and why i was compelled - yep, that's the word - compelled to write it
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Kelly Carlin · 12:03 AM

Yes, please.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:03 AM

★ Spotlighted from Jordan Birnbaum

“A fan of talent and vision regardless of gender. Although, yes, women are usually cooler.”

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Wendy Hammers · 12:04 AM

okay. simply, my dear friend - comedian and tv writer judy toll died and i woke up to my own mortality. i realized all the little stuff didn't matter and it was time to get on with the joy of life
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Kelly Carlin · 12:04 AM

Mortality! Such a big thing we all fear and yet....so powerful to face.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:05 AM

it's been said before. death is the great equalizer. the thing that reminds us to starting living. to grab life by the ovum, i guess.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:05 AM

Yes, we realize - OH...this shit is real and it's time to get on with it.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:05 AM

Happened to me when my mom died. I was34.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:05 AM

so true, kel. god knows you had your share of loss. i watch you being one who fully embraces life, cuz you get that it is a temporary state
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Kelly Carlin · 12:06 AM

★ Spotlighted from Jordan Birnbaum

“I think the only manageable way to handle death is to look at it as part of a much much bigger picture”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:06 AM

Good point Jordan - and to make it real to one's self is true freedom in some sense.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:06 AM

stare that fucker in the face!
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Wendy Hammers · 12:06 AM

yes, jordan, part of a continuum
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Kelly Carlin · 12:06 AM

★ Spotlighted from Kit Nowell

“muuuuuch bigger picture”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:07 AM

In Ripe - you come to grips with your body too
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Wendy Hammers · 12:07 AM

that many "uuuu's" sounds very woo woo and new age to me, kel. and you may be right. but since i am not convinced there is an afterlife, i am wildly committed to fully dancing through this one
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Kelly Carlin · 12:08 AM

funny how death and the body are connected.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:08 AM

well, I dont' know if there is one either - but to bring meaning to life can create that muuuuuch bigger picture.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:08 AM

thanks for getting me back to Ripe. so, here's the deal. as i say in the show "i had a battle with my body for over 30 years and now the war is over". i surrendered. to what? to loving myself unconditionally. there i said it. now you sounds woo woo?
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Kelly Carlin · 12:09 AM

But that feels like a huge leap - unconditionally accepting your body. SO hard in this culture.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:09 AM

★ Spotlighted from Kit Nowell

“how does that work -- coming to grips with your body? may i have the recipe, pls?”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:10 AM

I know for me that having to let go of perfection is part of it, and also asking myself what I really want for my body.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:10 AM

here is the thing about my body and death, kel, and the connection. in the end, when judy was dying, my grandma gussie, and just this week, our sweet kitty cat calypso, it is so apparent that the spirit the life force - that is the thing. the body -
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Wendy Hammers · 12:12 AM

i love that - what you really want for your body. beautiful. i would say this to kit and anyone wondering how and when they can make peace with their body - get into gratitude for what you do have physically. not want you don't.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:13 AM

the body is temporary. the spirit is the thing.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:13 AM

Gratitude is playing a big role in my life these days.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:13 AM

As I dis-connect more from the frenzy and trance of consumerism, I see how little I need or want.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:13 AM

of course. gratitude. the ability to take stock in what we have - i believe this to be one of the keys to happiness
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Kelly Carlin · 12:14 AM

So true. And as one ages - how has your relationship changed with gratitude?
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Kelly Carlin · 12:14 AM

★ Spotlighted from Kristin Ciasulli

“Any harder than accepting your age?”

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Wendy Hammers · 12:14 AM

in RIPE the play, i dance. a lot. and when i dance, my body is perfect. ageless. weightless. figure out what your dance is and do that
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Kelly Carlin · 12:14 AM

Love that
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Kelly Carlin · 12:14 AM

It's so true.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:14 AM

When we move and are in teh moment...
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Kelly Carlin · 12:15 AM

all our ideas about our selves are gone.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:15 AM

yes, no time to judge or compare when in flight
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Kelly Carlin · 12:15 AM

we are just with ourselves.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:15 AM

★ Spotlighted from Kit Nowell

“yes, dance!”

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Wendy Hammers · 12:15 AM

kit..do you love to dance?
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Kelly Carlin · 12:15 AM

I found the weekend of my fiftieth bday I danced a alot
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Kelly Carlin · 12:15 AM

and got back into my body in a new deep way.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:16 AM

★ Spotlighted from Kit Nowell

“i do, wendy.”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:16 AM

★ Spotlighted from Jordan Birnbaum

“Does it take 50 years of life experience to reach this head space? Cause I'm 42 and still pretty neurotic.”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:16 AM

Jordan - there is something about age that helps.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:16 AM

a lot of times is not our bodies we don't like, but some idea we have about what they should look like. i think it's important to make that distinction
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Kelly Carlin · 12:16 AM

Yes.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:17 AM

There's something that happens as you have more life experience and less future ahead.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:17 AM

do you remember the last time you did dance? for me, my hip hop class is sacred time celebrating being in my skin. 3 times a week. the highlight of each week
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Kelly Carlin · 12:17 AM

And I make excuses NOT TO dance.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:18 AM

how fucked up is that?
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Kelly Carlin · 12:18 AM

Denying myself the very thing that keeps me feeling alive and whole.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:18 AM

★ Spotlighted from Kit Nowell

“i do, wendy. 5 Rhythms dance has become very important to m”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:18 AM

It's like I go to sleep and forget what is real.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:19 AM

★ Spotlighted from Jordan Birnbaum

“definitely sounds more fun than therapy 3 times a week. and less expensive. of course, I wouldn't know...”

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Wendy Hammers · 12:19 AM

you are gorgeous always, kel, but especially when you dance. no excuse not to do it. it's oxygen. i just tell people i am in a meeting. and i am. with my dance
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Kelly Carlin · 12:19 AM

I love it.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:19 AM

LOL. yes, more fun, less expensive than therapy.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:19 AM

i love 5 rhythms. do you dance with jo c. or michael?
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Kelly Carlin · 12:20 AM

Kit is in NC
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Kelly Carlin · 12:20 AM

So, what happens at 50? What is released?
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Wendy Hammers · 12:20 AM

jordan, i don't even know you, but i can see you in hip hop called. you'd be an instant rock star
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Kelly Carlin · 12:21 AM

★ Spotlighted from Maggie Ragaisis

“I dance in my underwear in my house, like Tom Cruise in RISKY BUSINESS. Does that count?”

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Wendy Hammers · 12:21 AM

oh ny. i started with gabrielle roth back in the day.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:21 AM

Most definitely!
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Kelly Carlin · 12:21 AM

Dancing in one's underwear should be a requirement of all citizens.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:21 AM

Less war.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:22 AM

maggie, underwear dancing is essential. just no need to become a scientologist
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Kelly Carlin · 12:22 AM

lol
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Kelly Carlin · 12:22 AM

So back to the topic...
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Kelly Carlin · 12:23 AM

Wendy - what has clicked inside of you these last few years. What have you let go of?
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Kelly Carlin · 12:23 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rebecca Westbrook Toker

“Jordan, I highly recommend dance. I didn't start until I was 21. It teaches you ways to experience and communicate through your body that flesh out who you ARE. No kidding.\”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:24 AM

It accesses parts of the brain that day to day life just can't.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:24 AM

i've let go of using the scale to punish myself. i have finally accepted i am loveable and sexy at any weight. i will be thinner and heavier that i am now in my lifetime but my ability to love and be loved..that is non negotiable. took me a loooong
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Wendy Hammers · 12:24 AM

time to get that.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:25 AM

So beautiful.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:25 AM

Especially living in LA where being a size zero is required.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:25 AM

Self-acceptance.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:26 AM

When you risked loving yourself - what surprised you?
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Wendy Hammers · 12:26 AM

thanks. it is a process. one day at a time. i look at other woman with bodies that i admire and think i bet it would be fun to have those long long legs, or their flat stomach. but i love my life. and this is the body that allows me to live my life.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:26 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rebecca Westbrook Toker

“Wendy, I WANT THAT. I can talk good game, but I don't really believe it yet. And I have a small son, so I DESPERATELY want to be woman who is happy with herself for him. HOW?”

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Wendy Hammers · 12:27 AM

so i love my body. and try to practice that. my friend deborah kagan says shower yourself with love. like literally, while you are showering, thank the universe for your healthy body as you wash it.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:28 AM

For me - Rebecca - it has come with letting go of the need for approval from others.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:28 AM

and especially love the parts that i have judged the most in my lifetime. god knows they can use some extra love
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Kelly Carlin · 12:28 AM

I really see that I am most happy when I'm following the still, small voice inside me. TRUSTING MYSELF.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:29 AM

the approval thing, and not needing it. that is key. and definitely a lesson that comes with being older, or as i like to call it, seasoned
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Kelly Carlin · 12:29 AM

yes - the focused act of loving your physical body - the one with health in it. the one that allows us to walk...etc. Powerful.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:29 AM

★ Spotlighted from Kit Nowell

“i'm pretty good at letting go of what others think of me, but only because i do the hammering myself”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:29 AM

So - think of that Hammering Voice as someone else and tell them to FUCK OFF.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:30 AM

b/c that voice is just an internalized version of some external voice you once encountered.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:30 AM

★ Spotlighted from Kit Nowell

“aye, aye coach”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:30 AM

★ Spotlighted from Jordan Birnbaum

“So do these epiphanies affect how you feel when you wake up in the morning?”

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Wendy Hammers · 12:30 AM

rebecca...look around your life. do you see folks that are really ill, physically or mentally? be grateful that you are you. that you'd got your set of challenges and the gifts that go with them.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:31 AM

Most mornings I wake up and say - oh, shit what now.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:31 AM

but lately, it's been shifting.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:31 AM

yes, our friend jeffrey used to say take a long walk on the beach with those negative voices and fire them. i like to imagine actually shoving the voices into the ocean and drowning them.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:31 AM

now it's - oh, fuck
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Kelly Carlin · 12:31 AM

just kidding!
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Kelly Carlin · 12:32 AM

yes - or buying them a plane ticket to a far far far away place
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Wendy Hammers · 12:33 AM

i think of my friend judy toll's joke about waking up and the birds are singing and the sun is shining and then she thinks, oh fuck. i forgot. my life SUCKS!
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Kelly Carlin · 12:33 AM

★ Spotlighted from Jordan Birnbaum

“anyone else have that James Taylor song in your head? "Shower the people you love with love. Show them the way that you feel."”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:33 AM

I recently had an epiphany about aging - if the culture is no longer going to see me as significant or fuckable or having anything to contribute - than I am FREE to do what I like.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:33 AM

lol - wendy
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Kelly Carlin · 12:33 AM

yes - jordan NOW I DO.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:34 AM

FREEEEEEEE!!!!
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Wendy Hammers · 12:34 AM

nice jordan. nice. LOL. james taylor reference. you're an old soul. or you have older siblings.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:34 AM

★ Spotlighted from Amy Engelhardt

“Watching the news affects my day more than anything else. Aside from getting an albatross of an email. I pride myself on being well-informed but need to step away for chunks of time and only deal with what I can control... ya know?”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:34 AM

Yup.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:34 AM

★ Spotlighted from C. Brian Smith

“I think you are both fuckable.”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:34 AM

You too Bri.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:35 AM

amy engelhardt in the house. along with love showers, i vote for media fasts from time to time. all except TAWK, of course.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:35 AM

Media fasts have become an essential part of me being able to stay connected to what is real for me.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:35 AM

OMG. the hottest gay man i know thinks i'm fuckable. i can die now.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:36 AM

Trees are real. My body is real. Fantasizing about fucking C. Brian Smith is real.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:36 AM

i love c. brian smith. yum. is that off topic?
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Kelly Carlin · 12:36 AM

★ Spotlighted from C. Brian Smith

“Can you give me his number?”

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Wendy Hammers · 12:36 AM

kel...LOL. i've had that fantasy too. i know a lot of straight women who have a think for taylor negron.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:37 AM

So - so far we've identified dancing or some other thing that helps one to connect to the body. Letting go of the voices in our heads...
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Wendy Hammers · 12:37 AM

LOL. brian...you. you are the best. seriously.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:37 AM

here's my list:
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Kelly Carlin · 12:37 AM

facing death...
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Kelly Carlin · 12:37 AM

go
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Kelly Carlin · 12:38 AM

★ Spotlighted from Kristin Ciasulli

“C. Brian is always off topic. ;)”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:38 AM

And that is why we love him.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:38 AM

1. dancing 2. not giving power to popular but limited ideas about beauty 3. surround self with loving peeps and ideas 4. eat real food 5. binge on art 6. adorn oneself
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Kelly Carlin · 12:39 AM

Love it.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:39 AM

Mine would be...
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Wendy Hammers · 12:39 AM

be friends with kelly carlin. always a good idea.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:39 AM

stillness in the morning before anything else
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Kelly Carlin · 12:39 AM

read something inspiring
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Wendy Hammers · 12:39 AM

cue the music: free your mind and the rest will follow
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Kelly Carlin · 12:39 AM

laugh
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Kelly Carlin · 12:40 AM

have sex when i feel like it (I spent years avoiding my own desires)
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Kelly Carlin · 12:40 AM

★ Spotlighted from C. Brian Smith

“what scares you guys the most?”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:40 AM

dying alone
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Kelly Carlin · 12:40 AM

or having to work in a cubicle.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:40 AM

same thing
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Wendy Hammers · 12:41 AM

i want to say more about the play. it is my hope that as i start to travel the country in november and share my story with countless women, i hope the play will give them permission to love themselves more deeply.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:41 AM

It will. It will.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:41 AM

Your aliveness on stage is stunning to witness and a healing to all who see it.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:41 AM

Truly.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:42 AM

whoa back up? what do you mean, kel? you had more or less sex than you desired?
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Kelly Carlin · 12:42 AM

You are the embodiment.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:42 AM

I had less than I desired. I would shy away from my own desire. OLD shit stuck in my head..
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Kelly Carlin · 12:42 AM

sigh.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:42 AM

aww, honey. thanks. i just know when all of us are doing work that truly feeds us in our gut we actually look and feel our best.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:43 AM

I would shy away from most things that I desired in a deep and true way. It's what I learned to do to be a GOOD GIRL.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:43 AM

★ Spotlighted from Kit Nowell

“Bring Ripe to NC!”

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Wendy Hammers · 12:44 AM

wow. so interesting to hear you say this. i want to bring this up now - i have believed for many years that, generally speaking, women want and enjoy sex more than men. the opposite of what the culture would have you believe.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:44 AM

That is interesting...say more.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:44 AM

★ Spotlighted from Leanne McNeil

“Ooh I know that one Kelly. Catholic school even though I eschewed it on the surface still had me thinking it was better not to.”

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Wendy Hammers · 12:44 AM

good girls are not only allowed to be bad. it's what make them good. :) we are all duality. all.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:45 AM

say more. okay. soooo, as a stand up comic for over 30 years, i have spent a lot of time sharing the bill with other comics. mostly men.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:45 AM

And when we WANT it...we are deemed bad. And if we don't put out...we are deemed bad. Confusing.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:46 AM

yes...
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Wendy Hammers · 12:47 AM

here' s the bizarre thing. many of the straight men comics i have worked with. not all, but many, talk in their acts about wanting sex but their wife or girlfriend ain't havin' it. sort of the old rodney dangerfield i get no respect model.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:47 AM

...certainly a common theme in comedy clubs...
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Wendy Hammers · 12:48 AM

lots of jokes have been made at women's expense about how they want it and we don't. it's bullshit.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:48 AM

It's one of the oldest premises there is...
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Wendy Hammers · 12:49 AM

a lot of awkward, social uncomfortable men doing bits about women don't want sex. Newflash: we want sex, just not with them!
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Kelly Carlin · 12:49 AM

lol
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Kelly Carlin · 12:49 AM

★ Spotlighted from Kit Nowell

“This could be a topic unto itself”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:49 AM

Yes - Kit - so true.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:50 AM

thank you kit. think about it. we, women, are physically capable of having more sex. i mean, really. no wham bam thank you maam and pass out for us. ya know what i'm saying?
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Kelly Carlin · 12:50 AM

This is part of why 'getting rid of the patriarchy in my head' is essential. All these messages about how we do sex wrong no matter what.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:51 AM

I want to be free of all of that and love my body and what it wants. Not demonize it.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:51 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rebecca Westbrook Toker

“I see freedom coming from not being the central figure who keeps things running in a busy household. I love this time as a mother, but I crave time alone to get right with myself. Advice? It's hard to transcend when you haven't slept in 2 years...”

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Wendy Hammers · 12:51 AM

i have often thought that stand up was male set up punchline, like cum, then pass out. women, are storytellers, we have lots of stories and lots of orgasms. anyone following this?
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Kelly Carlin · 12:51 AM

Yes!
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Kelly Carlin · 12:51 AM

I love that Wendy.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:52 AM

Do you think that this is a clue to why some male comics don't see women as funny?
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Kelly Carlin · 12:53 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rebecca Westbrook Toker

“Yes, Kelly - that's a huge and stupid thing that women have to ditch. It's not JUST the patriarchy, it's the CHRISTIAN/PROTESTANT patriarchy that JUST WON'T DIE!!!”

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Wendy Hammers · 12:53 AM

thanks, kel. i have to shout out to rebecca. your kids are young it sounds like. it gets better. i promise. i have a nearly 17 year old. but do whatever you can to steal time for yourself. to recharge. happy mommy. happy baby
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Kelly Carlin · 12:53 AM

★ Spotlighted from Kit Nowell

“Definitely multiple stories.”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:54 AM

Yes - Rebecca - I'm not a mom, but I know what it's like to hand your life over to something besides one's self. Demanding some YOU time is essential first step. And not selfish.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:54 AM

and ya know, rebecca, the christians don't have a monopoly on fear and guilt. my friend, the great comedienne cathy ladman says religion is just guilt with different holidays.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:55 AM

i watch the religious jewish women and fantasize what it would be like to be them. but i couldn't do it. not even for a day. no cleavage allowed. that alone would be a deal breaker
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Kelly Carlin · 12:55 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rebecca Westbrook Toker

“LOL, Wendy. Touche.”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:55 AM

Well, we are almost finished here...
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Kelly Carlin · 12:55 AM

I know we could go on forever.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:55 AM

So, let's do this again soon.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:55 AM

no!! just getting started. be good to yourself all. don't wait for tomorrow.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:56 AM

What would you like to leave us with, Wendala?
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Wendy Hammers · 12:56 AM

okay. until next time. hugs all around,
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Kelly Carlin · 12:56 AM

And I would add - take time to just BE. You are all miracles, and that is without the baby Jesus.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:56 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rebecca Westbrook Toker

“Kelly and Wendy, PLEASE do round 2. This is such a rich, complex Tawk!”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:56 AM

We will do more!
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Wendy Hammers · 12:56 AM

hmmn. celebrate your life while you can. and the best weight to love yourself? the one you are at right fuckin' now.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:57 AM

Amen.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:57 AM

Thank you all for coming, hanging, chatting, playing and dancing with us. I feel so grateful.
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Wendy Hammers · 12:57 AM

mwah!
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Kelly Carlin · 12:57 AM

mwah!
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Wendy Hammers · 12:58 AM

come visit me all at www.ripetheplay.com or www.wendyhammers.com. let's continue the community.
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Kelly Carlin · 12:58 AM

★ Spotlighted from Jordan Birnbaum

“Hey everyone - Rebecca and I are about to do a Tawk in which I Interview her about her time in the peace corps! Come join! http://tawke.rs/13aMIil”

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Kelly Carlin · 12:58 AM

And I have Kyle Cease on my podcast tomorrow!
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Wendy Hammers · 12:59 AM

will tune in