RT

Sexual Relations in the 2010s

Aug 30, 2013

JN
Stage· 218 messages
Aug 30, 2013

Jeremy Naranjo brings his observations about gender roles in modern society and the disappearance of genuine "manliness." What's up with that? Let's Tawk about it!

RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:00 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rick Rosner

“Hello All! I suspect for this topic I'll be primarily a voyeur, occasionally uttering a devastatingly clever bon mot (s).”

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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:00 AM

Rick, I'd expect no less. ;)
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:00 AM

Welcome, everyone!
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:00 AM

If this is your first time, welcome! Log in to participate.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:01 AM

Audience members, you can log comments, ask questions and chat amongst yourselves. Be sure to click on the “Who’s Here?” button and click to listen to the other audience members so you can see their comments.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:01 AM

Comments can be “upvoted” by clicking the thumbs-up sign in the bottom right corner. This will change the comment to “Overheard” status, as signified by the blue OH symbol in the upper left-hand corner.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:01 AM

The hosts can see your comments only after they’ve been “Overheard.” We’ll try to spotlight these comments to answer your questions and include as many comments as possible. Glad you’re here!
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:01 AM

Jeremy, are you here yet?
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:02 AM

(I messed up the time zone thing again. See, Jeremy's in Arizona, and I'm in Montana.)
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:02 AM

And I thought, "Hey, same time zone. Whew!"
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:02 AM

EXCEPT
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:03 AM

Arizona is the only state with enough common sense to dispense with the time change.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:03 AM

So that happened.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:04 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rick Rosner

“In this case, Rebecca you can discuss sex in the 2010s with yourself.”

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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:04 AM

Well, there's no confusion there, Rick...
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:05 AM

It says you're here.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:05 AM

Ok am i in?
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:05 AM

Hooray!
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:05 AM

Hey, Friend!
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:06 AM

Sorry about the mix-up!
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:06 AM

★ Spotlighted from Darren Rudy

“Hi Jordan and Rebeccca and Lucy and Blake. I am a Virgin tawker LOL”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:06 AM

Hello. SOrry for the delay. Arizona time is different then the rest of the worlds.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:06 AM

Glad to meet you, Darren!
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:06 AM

And so is Montana's.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:06 AM

Glad you're here, Jer.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:06 AM

Man, I miss you!
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:07 AM

SO, why don't you tell the audience a little bit about who you are and where you're coming from?
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:08 AM

Can everyone else see the little dots that signify typing?
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:08 AM

Thy are not there for me today...
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:08 AM

Oh wait - I have those.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:09 AM

Technical difficulties.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:10 AM

Whew!
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:10 AM

You're here!
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:10 AM

Hello.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:11 AM

Yes?
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:11 AM

Am I in?
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:11 AM

WHew!
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:11 AM

Yes!
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:12 AM

Jeremy is...one of the deepest thinkers I know. I met him in college.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:13 AM

OK am I In?
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:13 AM

Yes!
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:13 AM

Keep talking!
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:13 AM

Tawking.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:14 AM

Hello.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:14 AM

Hello
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:14 AM

Hello
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:15 AM

★ Spotlighted from Darren Rudy

“Hi Rachel”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:15 AM

Well I can spot light.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:15 AM

Yes!
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:15 AM

So what did you even major in in college?
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:17 AM

Ok. I guess you guys can see my comments. So, let's get started. Very sorry guys. I thought this would start an hour from now. plus the technical difficulties.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:17 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rachel McDonnell

“we will get through this one way or another lol :) Excited for the tawk.. p.s. I think technology is on strike today it hasn't been working well for me all day either lol”

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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:18 AM

Thanks, Rachel. ;)
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:18 AM

Rebecca. Last I see from you is "Rick, Ide expect no less. "
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:19 AM

Refresh!
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:19 AM

Okay, not to jump ahead of Jeremy, let's keep ourselves amused.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:20 AM

I have some links that Jeremy has been sending me over the last month as we tried to find a central theseis for tonight.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:20 AM

thesis, that is.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:20 AM

Well, guys I see the audience's comments but not REbecca. SO, I'm gonna just talk blind to the audience I guess.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:21 AM

A round of see you if you can. Let me know that you see me writing.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:23 AM

I see you!
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:23 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rick Rosner

“I don't see you. I can read your words.”

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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:23 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rick Rosner

“All this tawk. When do the sexual relations start?”

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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:24 AM

http://www.sinuousmag.com/2012/12/jada-pinket-smith-war-on-men/?fb_action_ids=10201278625800308&fb_action_types=og.likes&fb_ref=recommendations-bar&fb_source=timeline_og&action_object_map=%7B%2210201278625800308%22%3A526401274036820%7D&action_type_ma
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:24 AM

Okay. That's a link to a speech by Jada Pinkett-Smith.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:24 AM

We are looking to see if there's a quick fix.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:25 AM

If there isn't one, we can call it and reschedule.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:25 AM

I've already got blisters on my typing fingers!
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:25 AM

Ok, how is this?
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:25 AM

http://www.artofmanliness.com/2012/05/13/want-to-feel-like-a-man-then-act-like-one/
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:26 AM

Okay, Rick - so you tell us - when did YOU feel like a man?
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:26 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rick Rosner

“I'll even settle for a dirty phrase.”

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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:26 AM

I can see you Jer - can you see me???
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:26 AM

Hello,
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:27 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rachel McDonnell

“"There is a deep sadness when I witness a man that can’t recognize the emptiness he feels when he objectifies himself as a bank and truly believes he can buy love with things and status." great speech! I agree with this”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:27 AM

Ok, maybe we've got it.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:27 AM

It's good stuff!
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:27 AM

I sure hope so!
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:27 AM

Ha! You're still typing!
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:27 AM

OK, I"M UP SO SORRY.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:28 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rick Rosner

“Jesus Christ. I'm getting old; let's get this going before I lose the ability to get excited.”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:28 AM

Now, let's jump in. Where to start Rebecca I'm flustered.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:28 AM

We're ALL hot and bothered.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:28 AM

Okay - who are you?
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:28 AM

Let's not set to much of the wrong tone. We've already mislead folks with our title.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:28 AM

Delivered in the caterpillar voice from Alice in Wonderland
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:29 AM

I know - which was ingenious on your part.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:29 AM

The basic premise we are starting from is that gender roles are in flux and no one really knows how to behave anymore
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:30 AM

Who am I? What a question. I'm a guy trying to get on in life as best as possible. I'm a Film maker with a BA in poli sci. A some times writer and currently my day job is as a special ed assistant.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:30 AM

And you're a fitness buff.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:30 AM

Beach Body coach.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:30 AM

Yes, I guess so. I use to be pretty heavy and got tired of it. I like being a fitness buff much better.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:30 AM

;)
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:31 AM

So, I think this all started for you and me when I posted an article on Japanese "Grass eaters"
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:31 AM

Do you remember that?
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:31 AM

Give me a refresher on that one.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:32 AM

Ok I'll circle around and get the the meat of the issue. What was the thing you remember that made you think I might be on to something?
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:32 AM

I would like to state I in no way consider myself an expert in anything except trying to better my life.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:33 AM

Well, I was in Honduras from 2007-2009. I came back a man-hater. Really, the misogyny there is out-of control.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:33 AM

I can kinda remember that.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:33 AM

And, like most feminists, I figured it was all the fault of men, the great oppressing forge.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:33 AM

force, I mean.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:33 AM

We are pretty terrible.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:33 AM

:P
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:34 AM

But I saw some posts of yours about the search for the meaning of manhood, about looking for true manliness in this day and age.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:34 AM

And it changed my thinking dramatically.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:35 AM

Ok, well. I think it was where I was at the time. I was raised by a single mother. I didn't know my father blah blah...So, I was constantly looking for roll models. I took most of mine from literature and films. Which made for an interesting adolesce
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:36 AM

★ Spotlighted from Lucy Dyer

“not all men are terrible”

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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:36 AM

That's true, Lucy, but I had a lot of shit to deal with in Hondu-land. And my dad's a dick, so I had to work through that, too.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:36 AM

I was told once in church for all of the men to look at their finger nails if you had curled your hands in and turned them over to see them you were straight. If you extended your frngers and inspected them from above you were gay. No joke....
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:36 AM

Wow. That's surreal!
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:37 AM

It took me a month or two at my age to decide for myself what crap that was. In the mean time I was like crap? I'm gay? Funny I don't like men.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:38 AM

Oh. Wow. That'll mess with your head.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:38 AM

The point is that I started thinking about gender identity pretty early. I do think that what you expereinced is pure man run society without balance.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:38 AM

Indeed.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:39 AM

But what I'm interest in here is hearing about your search for gender identity And your thoughts on how difficult it is for young men these days.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:40 AM

So, jump to a few years later. At 26ish. I looked in the mirror and saw a full grown freaken man looking back at me. It was almost and out of body experience because what I saw did not match what I felt inside.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:41 AM

Now, at first this was something I wouldn't talk about because it is very private and kinda embarrassing. But I've learned since how common it is today. I only know today. so maybe it has always been?
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:42 AM

★ Spotlighted from Jordan Birnbaum

“The whole gender discrimination element of humanity is an ugly extension of "mihgt makes right." Now we're trying to use ideas to get past that. It's complicated...”

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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:42 AM

★ Spotlighted from Darren Rudy

“why did you not feel like a man? Was it representations of media or male role models in your life?”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:43 AM

It is complicated. I don't think it was always just about "might". Purely. But now we don't seem to have a place in society at all for "Might".
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:43 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rachel McDonnell

“I don't know why both genders are really uncomfortable with discussing and exploring their emotions and feelings especially when everyone goes through gender identity and personal growth throughout their lives”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:43 AM

Why? I don't know. I didn't feel as substantial as I expected. Maybe it was expectations. I didn't feel settled. I felt like a boy.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:44 AM

Any one else identify?
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:44 AM

I personally ran away from my gender. Anything that made me female or 'weak' was embarrassing. Part of that was growing up in the Bible Belt.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:45 AM

I guess what Rebecca wanted me to get to is some observations on how I believe society is becoming nutered at least in public spaces.
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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:46 AM

★ Spotlighted from Lucy Dyer

“is gender going out of fashion? are the words male and female just going out of fashion?”

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Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:47 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rachel McDonnell

“p.s. is it true we all still feel 16 inside because I do.. I talk to my parents about that and they say that self-image doesn't really change as you get older..”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:47 AM

Lucy, I think they are in some ways. I'm not sure where it will settle. Right now there are some rebellions about this because of the toll it is taking on young men. We posted a little short ted talk about young boys failing in school and withdrawing
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:47 AM

Rachel, I'm 30. I have a kid. I have JUST NOW started feeling comfortable with myself, feeling like an adult in my own right.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:47 AM

from society at large because they have no safe way to express themselves in their natural state.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:48 AM

I do think that gender neutrality is the trend. I don't think it's awesome. I think it's failing BOTH genders.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:48 AM

To some degree the flannel facial hair hipster thing is a way I see fashion looking for the male.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:49 AM

Yes, exactly. Women are trying to down play the feminine and men to be successful in all but say investment baking and the military must down play their masculinity.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:50 AM

(http://www.theguardian.com/world/2009/dec/27/japan-grass-eaters-salaryman-macho) Here's the Grass-eaters article, for anyone who's interested.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:50 AM

Now I'm purely talking about the majority here. Not the rights of expression of the miniority which is valid but not my concern here. The metrosexual gets along in todays work place best.
RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 1:50 AM

Wow.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:52 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rick Rosner

“Don't try that metrosexual shit in MT, WY etc.”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:52 AM

What's the population of those states?
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:52 AM

Sure there are exceptions. But this is the trend.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:53 AM

For the sake of time. For myself I am going through an ever evolving process of creating my own code of masculinity of manhood. One thing I left out is the absence of rights of passage in our society today.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:54 AM

We also glorify extended adolesence. Ok back to it. one thing that today offers is a person the ability to define it for themselves.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:55 AM

traditionally manhood was given when you could begin to contribute to the tribe. When you could take your place among the warriors defending and when you could kill meat and bring it in. With some ajustments I believe for me at least this is still
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:57 AM

important. For me in my code. Contributing to the welfare of the community and those in need is my path. I'm only begining it. I believe that most of us have at least a handful of people that had that something that made you say. There is a man.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:57 AM

There is a woman.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:57 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rachel McDonnell

“so Jeremy would you say that men and women should both operate a little more in the middle of the feminine - masculine scale?”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:58 AM

I think it depends for the. I think that they should both find for themselves what it really means and live that to their fullest. Without appology. I have friends that say. I"m rejecting femenism. I have a masters whatever.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:59 AM

I stay at home and am a mother and wife first. Others find a different path. I can't speak for women much. But for me I believe that a man does his best to build up those around him.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 1:59 AM

I've been typing fast fearing this will shut off at 7 will it?
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:01 AM

Being male can be destructive. Most civilized traditions acknowledge this. A young man's education was very specific to make him a "Gentle Man" Why because we can be brutal, agressive, compettative, and greedy.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:01 AM

★ Spotlighted from Darren Rudy

“we haven't heard much from rebecca much. Rebecca give us the female side of this discussion?”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:01 AM

★ Spotlighted from Sarah Meyers

“"civic involvement" is a huge part of being an adult. I like that phrase.”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:02 AM

However, these trates when tempered and channeled can be what makes us great as well. Not squelched and removed.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:02 AM

Teddy Rossavelt is a hero of mine in this regard.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:03 AM

★ Spotlighted from Darren Rudy

“what you are describing Jeremy is too much Yang”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:03 AM

★ Spotlighted from Darren Rudy

“testosterone does lead to risk taking, which has its plus side at time”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:05 AM

Yes, when you take out the risk and the game. When there are no winners or losers most males don't want to play. So it isn't about removing this but about directing it. Taking on daring big challenges and bringing your testosterone to it. ITS OK>
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:05 AM

★ Spotlighted from Sarah Meyers

“agressive and competative aren't negative qualities.”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:06 AM

Guys I'm sorry. I had notes and I was going to be more organized. I thought I had another hour when I sat down and saw the, "Starting now".
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:06 AM

★ Spotlighted from Jordan Birnbaum

“I think Rebecca is having the tech difficulties now...”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:06 AM

Blah. Ok. So this has been largely personal. What are your thoughts specifically to roles today?
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:07 AM

I feel like things are very confusing today in society. Sometimes not having a "Way it is done". means you don't know what is happening. Let's say in romance for instance.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:09 AM

Darren. talk to me. Do you think there is a Code of manliness?
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:10 AM

Uho I may be alone now.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:10 AM

★ Spotlighted from Sarah Meyers

“I don't think to path for finding "manliness" and "womanliness" are that different really. It's about caring about the community around you and not focusing on yourself. Children are self centered. Adult males and femlaes take care of the community.”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:11 AM

Yes, though they may look different. Here is the confusion. The expression.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:12 AM

I think as you said Sarah the process is similar. Though it was once thought that females had a kind of built in right of passage while men did not.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:13 AM

Though, I've learned since that even in traditional societies there is a lot of instruction that goes into femaile rights of passage as well.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:13 AM

★ Spotlighted from Darren Rudy

“I just read a story by Hemingway that has a take on becoming a man. The Short Happy Life of Francis Macomber.”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:13 AM

★ Spotlighted from Sarah Meyers

“I liked your definition Jeremy, of how the men's rite of passage was when they could help protect the village.”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:13 AM

★ Spotlighted from Sarah Meyers

“I don';t think "metrosexual" causes this. there's nothing wrong with a man who dresses up and keeps his body clean.”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:14 AM

Sarah, I'm more talking about a behavior. A gentleman knows how to dress as well. Read the "Grass Eater" article. There is a difference between a well dress man and the mentality of the metro sexual. Maybe not all.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:15 AM

A lack of agression.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:17 AM

I hate to even go there. Because I don't think it is inherantly bad. What I think is that we have downplayed the instinctual attributes of Masculinity. If some one is naturally they way they are we can respect that but it doesn't have to be at the
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:17 AM

expense of the man whose drive is expressed in more direct ways.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:18 AM

★ Spotlighted from Jordan Birnbaum

“Just spoke with Rebecca - her entire Internet is down. Jeremy, keep on rolling as long as you like, but she wants to schedule a new one! Guys please vote this up so Jeremy can see this.”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:18 AM

★ Spotlighted from Sarah Meyers

“My grandfather was a "MAN" to me, b/c he took his career very serriously, but also made time to help his city. and on top of that was a father.”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:18 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rick Rosner

“Having said that, I do believe the metrosexual label, like many others, is a joke.”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:19 AM

Yes, Sarah. I love your grandfather.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:20 AM

Rick, it was more used as a descriptive term a way of trying to create a mental image.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:21 AM

Again, the reason I brought that up is not really to disparage but to say that a certain nutered way of behaving in work places is the most excepted. EXCEPT for at the top most levels of management.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:21 AM

★ Spotlighted from Darren Rudy

“for the ladies, do you feel pressure to have children?”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:22 AM

Ok, now I don't think I am in the position to say what is a man. I can only say that I've wondered. That I had to define it for myself. That in so doing I found it is ok to be more traditionally male.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:24 AM

Maybe it was being raised by a woman but I thought I had to fight my natural instincts. It caused me to be weak of temperment fat and unhappy. By embracing my ambition my drive my determination my passion and energy I learned how to go after stuff
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:25 AM

and enjoy hardship. Now, I believe it is important to direct these instincts towards taking on challenges for others. What can I do as a young man to provide for some one else? Inside or outside my family?
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:26 AM

★ Spotlighted from Darren Rudy

“read Hemingway... he'll tell you what he thinks.”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:26 AM

Yes, I love Hemingway because of that. He and Teddy Rosavelt were brothers from another mother.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:26 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rachel McDonnell

“figure it out how are you going to explain that to your daughters?”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:26 AM

Explain what? Exactly Rachel?
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:28 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rick Rosner

“No, read The Tao - and stop thinking so much.”

JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:28 AM

Yes Rick. I am a thinker. I do over analyiz for sure. A character flaw. Which stands in the way of action much of the time.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:29 AM

That is why I think that the answers for the individual are pretty simple. While the concerns for society remain. I would invite you to friend my on FB. I will also post some things just to make you aware of some things experts are noticing.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:31 AM

For me it was simply define for myself, make the decision to live it, begin to take my place in society and shoulder more responsibility. I'm a man when I begin to do manly things. Or I'm an adult when I begin to act like one. Action is character.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:32 AM

That is really it. This all leads into a discussion Rebecca wants to do on education. Or is related. How todays class room is toxic to boys.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:32 AM

The education talk is center, toxic for boys a rabbit trail.
JN

Jeremy Naranjo · 2:33 AM

★ Spotlighted from Sarah Meyers

“@rachel: I have two kids, and your argument i why I work hard to have hobbies! I want my kids to know i'm a person, an artist, and a mom. not just a mom.”

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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:34 AM

I don't have kids but I do think it is important for them to know they are important but NOT the center of the universe. An observation from the class room.
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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:35 AM

Ok, well it was kinda all over the place. Very personal. I think it was just interesting to Rebecca because she didn't know any one that thought about how to positively express their manhood.
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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:37 AM

I don't think most people rationalize it the way I do or have so maybe it is useful for some. I hope so. I hope you at least begin to think about the place for male energy in society. I also hope that we can all mentor a young cousin or
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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:37 AM

join big brother big sisters or something.
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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:38 AM

★ Spotlighted from Sarah Meyers

“but it is hard for me to seperate my motherhood from my womanhood. it's also hard for me to seperate my sexuality from womanhood. If i was a childless celibate, would I still be a woman? not by my own current definition. That's hard for me.”

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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:40 AM

This is very interesting to me. It may have slipped through but I'm a traditionalist by inclination a liberal by education. again. If action creates being? then you would be right.
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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:43 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rachel McDonnell

“@Sarah.. well I am still a woman childless but I totally get your point of course it is a big part of how you define yourself.. I probably define myself differently because we have two very different lives not like one is better than the other..”

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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:43 AM

If their is a soul I believe it would be sexless.
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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:44 AM

Well guys. It was random. I was counting on Becca to keep me in line. She had an outline of things she wanted to achieve. I hope it was at least thought provoking. Mostly in how you will help the next generation navigate. I don't think it has to be
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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:45 AM

difficult or so delayed growing up and taking our places that is.
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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:45 AM

★ Spotlighted from Sarah Meyers

“not reject completely, b/c that would mean that you believe I'm not a woman : ) but to incorporate yourself and myself into it equally!”

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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:46 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rachel McDonnell

“so I guess as the minority in the gender roles in society it may better for us to not try and incorporate into those societal roles but instead reject them completely and lead by minority example maybe?”

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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:48 AM

Well, I hope so Jordan. I am working on a documentary idea for this subject.
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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:49 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rachel McDonnell

“yes very interesting and just opened up a lot of thought within me on society and its influence on us on top of our own influence on ourselves”

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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:49 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rachel McDonnell

“yes of course.. sarah yes I definitely do identify as a woman lol you are right grey areas need more attention :)”

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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:49 AM

Rachel are you guys talking more about the roles of female in femenist ideals? I think the trend is embracing the ability to choose the more traditional role of mother ect. Combined with the understanding that we can having anything in life
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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:50 AM

but not everything and definitely not everything at once. Men make these choices as well they just look differently.
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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:51 AM

I didn't even touch on media :
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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:53 AM

Every one out? I don't want to leave if any one is left.
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Jeremy Naranjo · 2:53 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rachel McDonnell

“just be who you want to be and help people out I say! :)”

RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 2:54 AM

★ Spotlighted from Darren Rudy

“nice talking with everyone”

RT

Rebecca Westbrook Toker · 2:54 AM

★ Spotlighted from Rachel McDonnell

“thanks jeremy! :)”